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Discovering Your True Self: Insights from Adam’s Return: The Five Promises of Male Initiation

May 5, 2023 by Andy Leave a Comment

Adam’s Return: The Five Promises of Male Initiation by Richard Rohr is a powerful book that offers guidance and encouragement for men seeking to embrace their true selves and live meaningful lives. In this blog post, we will explore the key themes and insights from the book, including the five promises of male initiation and the dynamic core idea.

The Five Promises of Male Initiation

The journey of male initiation is an essential part of growing up, but in our culture, many men miss out on this experience. Richard Rohr’s book offers insights into the challenges and opportunities of male initiation, outlining the five promises that are essential for men to become fully mature and fulfilled individuals.

1. Life is hard

The first promise of male initiation is to accept that life is difficult and learn to face challenges with courage and resilience. Men need to embrace the reality of struggle and suffering and develop the strength to overcome adversity.

2. You are not that important

The second promise is to move beyond egocentric tendencies and learn to see oneself as part of a larger whole. Men need to recognize their place in the world and the interconnectedness of all things.

3. Your life is not about you

The third promise is to discover a sense of purpose beyond oneself and learn to serve others. Men need to find a way to contribute to the world and make a positive impact on the lives of others.

4. You are not in control

The fourth promise is to accept that one cannot control everything and learn to surrender to a higher power. Men need to recognize their limitations and learn to trust in a greater force.

5. You are going to die

The fifth promise is to confront mortality and learn to live with a sense of urgency and purpose. Men need to embrace the reality of death and use it as a catalyst for living a meaningful life.

The Dynamic Core Idea

The dynamic core idea is a central concept in Adam’s Return. It refers to the core of a man’s being that is shaped by his experiences and relationships throughout his life. The dynamic core is divided into two parts: the false self and the true self.

The false self is the persona that a man presents to the world, based on external factors such as social status, wealth, or physical appearance. It can be fragile and easily threatened. The true self, on the other hand, is the authentic core of a man’s being, connected to his innermost desires, values, and purpose.

The dynamic core idea emphasizes the importance of men connecting with their true selves and living from a place of authenticity and purpose. This requires men to examine their beliefs and values, confront their fears and vulnerabilities, and embrace their unique gifts and talents.

The Elephant Dilemma

In the book, Richard Rohr shares a story about male elephants to illustrate the importance of male initiation in human culture. The story goes that in certain African tribes, when male elephants reach adolescence, they become aggressive and uncontrollable, endangering both themselves and others. To address this problem, the tribes began a practice of separating the young males from the herd and taking them on a journey of initiation, in which they are taught the skills and knowledge necessary to become mature and responsible adult elephants.

During the initiation journey, the young male elephants are placed under the care of an older, more experienced bull elephant, who serves as their mentor and guide. The older elephant teaches the younger ones about the dangers of their behavior, the importance of cooperation and leadership, and how to be responsible and caring members of the herd. After completing the initiation process, the young males return to the herd as mature and respected members, capable of contributing to the well-being of the group.

Rohr uses this story to highlight the importance of male initiation in human culture, arguing that men need a similar process of initiation to become mature and responsible members of society. Without such a process, young men can become lost and directionless, unable to find their place in the world or contribute to the well-being of their communities. The five promises of male initiation outlined in the book provide a framework for this process, offering guidance and encouragement for men who are seeking to embrace their true selves and live meaningful lives.

Take it Home

What do I mean by take it home? Take it home, is another way of saying, “what did we learn from this?” How can we use the lessons learned and apply it to our own life and within our family.

Here are two powerful quotes from “Adam’s Return: The Five Promises of Male Initiation” by Richard Rohr:

“Most men live lives of quiet desperation, and die with their song still inside them.” This quote, attributed to Henry David Thoreau, captures the idea that many men live unfulfilled lives, unable to express their true selves or find a sense of purpose. Rohr argues that male initiation can help men break free from this pattern, enabling them to discover their authentic selves and live with greater purpose and meaning.

“If you do not transform your pain, you will surely transmit it.” This quote, attributed to Richard Rohr himself, speaks to the idea that unresolved pain and trauma can be passed down from one generation to the next. Rohr argues that male initiation can help men confront and transform their pain, enabling them to break free from destructive patterns and contribute positively to the world around them.

Conclusion

Adam’s Return is a powerful book that offers valuable insights into the challenges and opportunities of male initiation. By embracing the five promises and connecting with their dynamic core, men can become more resilient, compassionate, and fulfilled individuals, capable of making a positive impact on the world around them. The book is a valuable resource for anyone seeking to live a more meaningful and purposeful life.

Most men live lives of quiet desperation, and die with their song still inside them.

Richard Rohr

If you do not transform your pain, you will surely transmit it.

Richard Rohr
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Filed Under: Books, Fatherhood, Inward, Lifestyle, Manliness Tagged With: Books, Fatherhood, Inward, Lifestyle, Manliness

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