I have been having an ongoing conservation with Rob Kaiser from the All Around Growth Podcast on the subject of spirituality. The conservation reminded me of some poetry and some thoughts I had on this topic. I wrote these thoughts years ago, but they seem relevant today.
A Quiet Despair
My heart is numb to this pain I feel
I do not understand why I feel no remorse
My soul is callous to the sin I bear
This evil clings to my heart in a quiet despair
I do not realize what has become of me
Like everyone else, I feel lost and confused
I cry to God, wondering why I am this way
And alone I sit in my quiet despair, all alone
The remoteness that I feel causes me to hide
I hide away from what I really am
My soul thirsts for you but yet I deny
And hold on to something that is hard to let go
So alone I sit in my quiet despair, all alone
Departure
It was not until recently, when I departed from “religion” that I began to understand my relationship with God. My departure from church was an attempt to grow closer to God. I did not want to go to church so I simply did not go. Why should we feel that we always have to go to church because that is what we are supposed to do. I want to go to church for the right reasons. I needed time away so God could bring that desire back into my heart. I have to believe it 100% in my heart for it to be real to me.
Check out another blog post titled Finding my Path.
There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.
C.S. Lewis
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